Say it out loud and give it power. Conceal it and give it even more power. There must be another option. If Lynx’s strength, in us, is keeping other people’s secrets, Lynx’s weakness may be ignoring our own.
Acknowledging our secrets to ourselves is not enough. Sharing them with a trusted other breaks the power that suppression holds over us. Yet, how do we find a trustworthy confidant?
We think back to our childhood best friends, who would take our secrets to their graves. Now, we can only imagine someone who might honor us with that kind of loyalty. Oddly, in our dilemma, we begin including our secrets, in spite of, and turning betrayals around for something more.
Bigger life issues, make our youthful secrets look trivial. The memories of reliable companions; nevertheless, remain. Trustworthy people restore us. They bind our wounds, encourage our aspirations and provide patient pauses, giving our best selves, time to strengthen.
But what happens when a confidant double-crosses us? Will we see the act as devastating or propelling? As shattering as betrayals can be, they can also move us forward, and at times, quicker than loyalty.
Every duplicitous interaction offers us an invitation to go deeper into discernment. All of us are human and accidentally break confidences, not realizing what is sacred to another person. But, if we operate from grace and forgiveness we are more likely to find that deception can bless us with better opportunities.
Faithfully persevering through a breach of trust, gives us credibility. Gradually, we exude hope and witness other people, too, dispelling the shadows that someone else’s duplicitousness has cast.
We have to remember that we connect with the ones with whom we choose to share. Though some circumstances may prohibit complete honesty, more often we let fear rule our choices. How can we expect a true relationship with someone when we repeatedly choose to go to other people, rather than the one with whom we want a deeper connection?
Secrets haunt us, when we give them prominence? What if hiding our secrets; however, has compromised our power?
Sacred Ruminations*
What secret is keeping you from living freely?
If you are working through a breach of trust, how do you plan to use it as gift?